Matter Topic

Machi TV’s exclusive coverage of Particle Acceleration.
by Special Correspondent Matter Mani.

For the second consecutive week, the collective attention of the nation is on central europe. Last week it was the Nuclear deal and this week we have this matter topic. Though much of the action is happening at the Swiss-French border, the whole of India is eagerly following the events.

Senior statesman and Tamilnadu chief minister Dr. M. Karunanidhi has written a letter in pure tamil to the Swiss and French scientists wishing them success. In his letter, Dr Karunanidhi mentioned that Anna and Periyar appeared on his dreams last night and wanted MK to convey the wishes on behalf of all Tamilians.

Union Minister for shipping and transport, Mr T R Baaalooooooooooooo has requested the scientists to conduct the next experiment on Ram Sethu and not somewhere in europe.

Congress Spokesperson Jayanthi Natarajan (Is she not a doctor yet?) appeared on CNN-IBN and mentioned that the whole world should appreciate the fact that this particle acceleration is happening when congress is ruled by the high command consisting of Dr Mrs Gandhi, and Narendra Modi should accept defeat and resign from his chief minister post. Appearing on a debate ‘Does it really matter?’, conducted by Sagarika Ghose a visibly fired up Ms Natarajan mentioned these points. Ms Sagarika from CNN-IBN rightly intervened whenever BJP Spokesman Ravishankar Prasad offered to make a point, and concluded the debate by saying ‘India is a secular state in which Singh is King and the Hindutva forces must do some self introspection’.

Tamilnadu Film association president Ramanarayanan mentioned that the entire Tamil film industry will fast for a day, till Karnataka releases cauvery water. But when the reporters pointed out to him that this was a ‘matter’ topic and not related to Cauvery Mr Ramanarayanan quickly changed his stance and requested the Tamilnadu CM to grant special sops for tamil ‘matter’ movie makers. He said that Tamil matter industry is facing stiff competition from Kerala, and the CM needs to do something. Dr MK, who was presiding over the 100th day celebration of Vidyodaya school drama ‘Miss. Ava en pencila thirudittaa’ immediately announced that he will start writing story for a movie called ‘Matter Maanickam’. When someone mentioned that ‘Matter’ was not a tamil word, he immediately changed the title of the movie to ‘Vaazhapazathula oosi’ and was confident that this movies collection will beat the records set by his sleepbuster movie ‘uLiyin osai’. Matter king SJ Surya will be donning the lead role for this movie, and Namitha would be his partner.

Ex CM, Dr JJ mentioned that due to frequent power cuts Tamilians are not able to watch matter and the minority DMK government must resign owing moral responsibility. She also added that, AIADMK will organise state wide protests while she will oversee these protests from her Kodanandu estate.

DMDK chief Captain Vijayakanth said that if his party comes to power, he will distribute free torch light to every tamilian as it will be very dark inside the black hole (There are fears that this particle acceleration experiment might create a black hole and destroy the world). He also sarcastically remarked that due to frequent power cuts, Tamilnadu is already in a black hole and people must support DMDK in future as an alternate to DMK and AIADMK.

Thank you Nithya 🙂

26 thoughts on “Matter Topic

  1. சூப்பர் மேட்டர் அண்ணாத்தே 🙂

  2. Actually..The frequent power cuts in TN should have made the scientists think about conducting the matter experiment in Ram-Sethu.

    But then Mr.Ramdoss and HMK would have protested saying,”Matter as an experiment is against tamil kalacharam “and they would have burned the “orva Bommai” (effigies) of the scientists involved and then rajinikanth will apologize for it,saying he takes moral responsibilty over the “matter” topic and will say,”I did a mistake and wont repeat it”.

    can be continued for ever ..there are so many ppl in TN ,who will get involved with any matter leave alone this “matter “:)

    Prabhu,u rock..You should blog more often..any plans on reviving He-She ???

  3. Hi Prabhu ,

    Semma matter!!

    Amma adhu enna kadaisila ‘Thankyou Nithya’!!

    Matter ungulutha illa Nityatha !!

    Nithayatha irundha ungala enne ellarom super matter appudingarango?!!

    Enna Matter???!!!

  4. Pingback: How long would it take the Large Hadron Collider to defrost a pizza? « Take it or leave it

  5. Oru observation on your post – Considering the experiment was also an attempt to find the God’s particle, the Dravidian pagutharivu parties would be wishing that no such particle is found. Even if it is found, they would demand it to be named ‘Periyaar Dasan’ and not ‘Higgs Boson’.

    How can you forget the Mother-of-all-Matter-movies Shakeela? Shakeela announced the pada poojai for 2 new matter movies right when they beamed up those protons.

  6. Cool Post…. So… Back again to blogging after quite a big gap… great…

    each and every person seems to be getting a Dr. degree… even idiots like vijay… what a big cruel world..!!

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