Dear NN,

I have always been fascinated by this pub culture in Bangalore. I am very scared to enter there, since I hardly listen to English songs. What if I look like the odd man out? And I see so many young girls there. Please tell me the trick, .
-Rocky, Sanjay Nagar, Bangalore

Dear Rocky,

Hey not everyone who visits a pub is an expert in English songs. First, grow long hair. And start saying ‘Yo’ for anything and everything. Once you are inside the pub, just stay silent till the next song starts. The moment the next song starts playing, say woooo and clap along with the crowd. And start shaking your head. For the first 2 minutes, shake your head in vertical motion. You can mumble in low voice ‘ABCD ungappan dhaadi vandhaa vaadi varaati poadi’ based on the tune of the song. No one cares. And for the remaining two minutes, shake your head from left to right. And remember, in some songs there will be just music. In those conditions, you can pretend like you are playing the guitar. Then, shake your head as if someone mentioned to you, that you can’t visit the restroom for the next 6 hours. Bite your teeth, and shake the head mimicking the situation ;) That’s all. Visiting a pub is easy.